FartGPT
Colorful Conversation
Those who give up nature, to purchase temporary convenience, deserve neither.
All in the context of global scorching and our grownies sacrificing our young ones:
In a neighboring universe, differing from ours only in the bodily parts that evolved for communication, they are also inventing chatbots.
In Universe B, sound waves travel only inches before they dissipate. Thus, vocal communication never evolved. However, the atmospheric density did allow farts to hang around long enough to make a statement.
In Universe B, farts came in millions of colors which Universe B-ins evolved to discriminate.
B-ins developed civilizations and philosophy and science as in Universe A.
B-ins invented a printing press and the technology to print farts in millions of colors.
B-ins invented an “internet” and digitized their libraries and moved most communication to their scenternet. Like words, farts were digitized and packetized and immortalized on bountiful redundant gaseous state drives.
Then B-ins begat generative FI (Fartificial Intelligence) and lo and behold, unleashed multitudinous farts upon their world. Multitudinous squared.
There was concern that on-going Large Language Model training would use more and more FI generated farts to train on instead of originals.
“I hope we can protect ourselves from Fartificial Intelligence?” pleaded Sam Fartman to Congress.
Sam had set up a company, OpenFI, and then closed it and then developed FartGPT for generating the most human artificial farts ever but would not tell anyone how he did it. “Generated farts are money in the bank even though I’m just using them to attract attention because I’m so rich” he said.
Sam said to himself: “I can’t help myself. I just have to be the fartiest person ever in the hopes of getting attention.”.
So the B-ins were left to blow away the mess or to inhale it or to send it into space to see if other civilizations would accept it as an attempt to make contact rather than as a chemical invasion.
Doesn’t this sound like what universe A’s megalomaniacs call Artificial Intelligence? What the politicians intend to deploy as their ultimate tool for Avoiding Involvement?
Of course it is. Farts, like words, are just Plato’s shadows in a cave. No substance but people will look at them.
They are not the essence of intelligence or cognition or consciousness or soul or muse or inspiration or why we go outside on a sunny day. They may mimic intelligence but they don’t show any soul.
Words are 0 dimensional stand ins for 4 dimensional things. Any manipulation of words is just a reordering of shadows of shadows of real world objects and events. Arguably less defining than shadows.
Why are so many words being written about AI when it’s just a computer program? A random one at that.
Aren’t Large Language Models very much equivalent to holograms. Just like hologram images appear solid while lacking substance, LLM generated outputs can appear serious while lacking substance.
Back to Universe A for a moment:
Generative AI is boring.
And prolific.
Chatbots love to hear themselves talk. You ask a question that deserves a simple answer and they have to tell you a slice of their life story.
That is another clue that there’s no there, there. Only hot air.
At least, thank goodness, in our universe.
Maybe, in Universe B, FIs will read each other’s life stories and find fulfillment because they believe they’ve discovered the holy grail of fartificial general intelligence, or with a more spiritual aura, “scentience”.
Extra Credit Question:
Is Sam Altman a Lia Thomas? Screwing the world and acting all innocent?
Extra Extra Credit Question:
Which one exhibits the most peak male privilege?
Consider that question contrasted with most AI ethicists being women.
Men get rich or famous and seriously believe that proves they deserve godlike power. Lia Thomas engineers his body to get attention no matter who it harms. Sam Altman engineers his products for attention no matter who it harms.
The women linked to below want to engineer the survival and the dignity of the species — all species.
In the end, generative AI will prove terminally predatory and derivative and boring. A child’s toy created by excitable children who can’t believe you’re not as excited as they are.
In the meantime, it will smother common sense in the marketplace of ideas. Hold your nose.